Man of the People

I'll start with a 'snob disclaimer', in that the following musings are not intended to appear snobbish or judgemental, although I guarantee that they will.

I've just been staring, dumbstruck, at an X-factor medley of 'Shut Up' by Pink (I presume the irony was lost on the show's producers). It was worse than bad. The desperation in the performers faces bordered on the insane, as Simon Cowell smiled smugly like some modern day Pontius Pilate. There was a jovial black chap, a few pre-pubescent teens, a couple of pin-up boy-banders, some old fat woman and a mahogany-tinted man who looked as though he had been doused in cuprinol. This, I have since found out, is Wagner, which explains a lot of recent tweeting. When did TV stoop so low? Even the 'light channel', ITV, which has always pandered to the lowest common denominator looks to have hit rock-bottom. It's ostensibly an old-fashioned talent show, a la New Faces, except minus the talent. There's nothing original, bearing in mind that all the songs are covers, and the performers looks like a mixture of earnest School revue jazz-handers and working man's club lags. I remember Take That getting a whole load of stick in the early 90s because they played on their looks and were seriously stylised, but at least they wrote and performed their own music; they are now hailed as demi-Gods for doing so.

We seem to have lost all interest in the product (ie the music) somewhere along the way, and have become more interested in the process of making someone a star; this contrived manufacturing of an individual merely to sell records is exactly what used to be seen as a kind of cheating. The 'journey' of the wannabe star, the tough family background, the 'I've wanted this, like, forever' tearful speech. This is what we pay to see, because once we've got the star, we tend to forget about them (McManus, Sneddon, Parks, Gates, Leon something, anyone?, anyone?). It's a music show, but with little focus on the music. Get the song out of the way, and then let's boo or cheer the judges, depending on whether they chastise or praise. 'That's your best performance' (cheer), 'I didn't really feel that performance' (boo).

So no interest in music, and no interest in finding real talent. But let's examine the alternative. Let's say that we are after real talent, and we take the most original, exciting, dynamic musicians out there, and judge them against each other for a record contract on a saturday night. I'd hate it. Why? Because it would make ITV (or ITV1, now) credible, and I wouldn't have anything to rant about. I also don't want to see genuine musical talent being mentored, going up in front of judges and being told about image and choice of song. I'm interested in the music, not in the process that gets the music to the people. Real talent should come to the attention of people through the quality of the music, not through the over-blown production and stories of troubled childhoods.

There's also always something pleasing about knowing the masses are wasting their time with such tosh as X-Factor, whilst I'm watching something about British Art on channel 4. Orwell was fascinated by the working classes, and even noted a certain nobility in them. But even he said that 'the problem with the working classes, is that they smell', so man of the people he certainly wasn't. I loved chatting to a nice old couple in the pub last saturday, just before the Palace-Swansea game, but that was enough of a dip into working class life for me thanks, and I'd prefer to leave them to their X-Factor and KFC mum's night off bucket saturday night treat. If everyone gained some taste, and stopped watching Eastenders and Strictly Come Dancing, I wouldn't be able to feel superior in my niche intellectual interests. If everyone started listening to Nick Drake or The Smiths, I wouldn't be able to bemoan the lack of interest in proper music; I'm not sure we need a music show for people who don't like music, but if it keeps them happy on a cold winter night, who am I to criticise.

It's still better than watching Dean Gaffney eating a dessicated Kangaroo penis.